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Current Curiosities
[Reading] Object Lessons: Pencil by Carol Beggy [Listening] "Dreams" The Cranberries [Watching] You've Got Mail Today is the first Saturday in August, which means it's Stationery Store Day! Similar to Bookstore and Record Store Days, Stationery Store Day celebrates these often retro and niche shops and the folks engaged in analog writing and other paper crafts. To celebrate Stationery Store Day, here're a few of my favorites:
Thank you very much for your time. If you have recommendations or curiosities, please fill out this nifty contact form. Sending y’all supportive, well-caffeinated vibes, Creighton Today’s Pen(cil): TWSBI Vac Mini with Sailor Manyo Sumire
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Current Curiosities
[Reading] Ghost World by Daniel Clowes [Listening] "Jackson" by Trixie Mattel and Orville Peck [Watching] Harriet the Spy WE ARE THE MUSES I've never really been a country music fan, though there are a few exceptions. I grew up listening to Patsy Cline and Dolly Parton. (I watched Straight Talk and Steel Magnolias every time I was home sick from elementary school.) Other than that, I actively avoided country music because of its conservative undertones and eventual reactionary overtones. In middle school, I began exploring The Chicks when they released "Goodbye Earl," but it wasn't until 2003 when Natalie Maines spoke out at a London concert against George W. Bush and the impending Iraq War that I began listening more closely to The Chicks. To this day, Taking the Long Way remains one of my favorite albums in my vinyl collection and "Not Ready to Make Nice" is my go-to destress song. The song parallels (in a small, make it about me way) the frustration and confusion I often feel when speaking up about queer and trans issues in the workplace and then experiencing the reaction to it. The song also requires engaging complex systems requiring full focus on breathing, posture, and lyrics. Again, "Not Ready to Make Nice" is the perfect destress song. As a senior in high school, I had the opportunity to play drums on stage at a Shania Twain concert. I'd never really listened to her music before, but recognized a few tunes from the radio. During the day-long rehearsal, I bonded with her incredibly kind and patient fiddle player. I played on "(If You're Not in It for Love) I'm Outta Here!." Having untreated anxiety (which remained unaddressed until I turned 30 - uff da), I didn't fully appreciate or enjoy this unique experience in the moment. I was terrified of the full stadium and shook the whole time. But I paradiddled and maintained the beat. After the concert, I began listening to Shania Twain's catalog, and you know what, she's got some bops! Now, I look back on the experience proud of myself for carrying on. In college and graduate school, I developed a habit of listening to Patsy Cline's Greatest Hits while driving home after good first dates. Honestly, I'm not sure why. Maybe it's her longing, her bittersweetness? IDK. Maybe that's why there were so many first dates? Ope. Maybe it's the hint of something hopeful and playful in Cline's voice? Probably. Patsy was my post-date confidant. (I understand why Kyle Richards allegedly fell for a country crooner!) The Chicks' Gaslighter carried me through the dark early days of the COVID-19 pandemic, while I lived in southern rural Minnesota. At the time, I was managing fellows in a center focused on community and civic engagement at a prestigious liberal arts college. (God, I love working with students! They are brilliant and creative and full of optimism!) The office was hella dysfunctional, and having recently moved, I had no local friends (you know, social distancing and masking). So I participated in many (too many?) FaceTime and Zoom happy hours with family and friends spread across the country - and I listened to The Chicks on repeat. While replaying "Gaslighter," "Sleep at Night," and "Tights on My Boat" and reflecting on the songs of Patsy Cline I grew up with, I began to notice these country-singing women are strong, real life steel magnolias. I also realized that their music was speaking to my lingering pre-pandemic heartbreak. Before the pandemic I was in an on-and-off relationship with a nurse I met while teaching at the University of Kansas. Every time, I'd set new boundaries or attempt to disentangle myself from his manipulations, he'd find new ways to pull me back in. As I listened to "I Fall to Pieces" or "Here You Come Again" or "That Don't Impress Me Much," I understood men are shit and I deserved better. A tale as old as time, I believe a teapot one said. These ladies of country music began to build me up as the pandemic dragged on and I considered a move back to Fargo to be nearer my nieces and nephews and Greek grandma. Then in 2025, I was DOGE-d out of my role as a senior researcher (grant writing and community engagement) at an environmental research center after my Department of Energy grants were canceled by Trump and Musk. During my down time, I revisited Cowboy Carter, which had come out the summer before. While I updated my resume and applied for jobs, I streamed and spun the the second album in her trilogy nearly every day that summer. The eclectic mix of subgenres and featured artists lifted my spirits during this period of unemployment. At the end of that summer, I took a job at a local hardware store, and have enjoyed meeting folks in my neighborhood and seeing queer and trans customers feel a little more at-ease in a space, much like Country music, that's not always safe for us. [I remain hella underemployed. Anyone want to hire a sunny, team and goal oriented engagement leader, former educator, and dog-walker?] Through these country singing women, I've (re)learned to hone my resilience, lean into courage, and choose my peace - and to be fully present during the good times. Because the good times, like men, can be fickle. As Dolly once said, "The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain." I've seen a lot of rain, but I've also witnessed some stunning rainbows. Anyway, here are a few country songs that have caught my attention lately:
Thank you very much for your time. If you have recommendations or curiosities, please fill out this nifty contact form. Sending y’all supportive, well-caffeinated vibes, Creighton Today’s Pen(cil): Silver Fox Tools Titanium Mini Sharpie Caddy Current Curiosities
[Reading] Star Wars: Darth Maul - Son of Dathomir by Jeremy Barlow and Takeshi Miyazawa [Listening] "I Wanna Be A Cowboy Sweetheart" by Ruby Leigh [Watching] The Real Housewives of Orange County THE WRITING LANDSCAPE I’m a huge fan of Field Notes notebooks. (I used to be a Moleskine gurly, but the paper quality is meh.) I like the simplicity of Field Notes - the sturdy pocket-size kraft paper covers with thick paper, and three simple staples. (Staple Day, the day you reach the middle of each notebook exposing the bent staple legs, is silly and fun to observe each month.) Also, they fit perfectly into and hold up to the wear and tear of pants pockets! I'm partial to the graph (not lined, blank, or dotted) editions because the little boxes contain my all-caps writing with Sharpies and smooth cursive with fountain pens. Speaking of writing utensils, the paper holds up relatively well against the wetter, more diffusive inks of Sharpies and fountain pens. Again, it's the simplicity I appreciate. Like, I'll never be a Traveler's Company notebook user (no judgment) even though folks swear by them. I just do not like being constrained by a particular system with proprietary refills and endless accessories. It's too much. And the only real Field Notes accessories are book darts and rubber bands (to gather my Sharpies, post-its, and lip balm). Recently though, I tried something new with my notebooks. Nearly all Field Notes are portrait style (like most notebooks), but the other day I went rogue and turned mine landscape (like a check register; Gen-Z, google it). It was life changing. Now, there’s more room to write on one line, to continue thoughts without text-wrapping or carriage-returning as often. When open, I put post-it note to-do lists and other ephemera on the backs of the upper pages and write on the lower pages (because Sharpies and fountain pens do still bleed through depending on the speed of my writing). My Field Notes notebooks are less formal journals, more commonplace books. I brain-dump and to-do list, brainstorm and record. I try to complete at least one notebook per month, which can be daunting as I have small yet neat handwriting (even with a Sharpie). Occasionally, I'll take my Field Notes to a coffee shop and cosplay Harriet the Spy. I'll observe the other patrons, practicing description or dreaming up backstories based on scant visual clues. In college, I had a peculiar writing professor who assigned the class this activity as a weekly exercise. The first few times, it was uncomfortable, but eventually I relaxed and realized there's always more to the story, always room for curiosity. As a teacher, I had my own students do a variation on this activity, requiring them to investigate a subculture they did not belong to. I wanted my students to combine different kinds of research (interviews, observations, and databases) and situate themselves as active participants in their projects instead of relying on the passive and pretensive objectivity of the sciences. During this project, I encouraged my students to keep a little notebook to record observations and insights, note questions and curiosities. Some did. Some didn't. Analog isn't for everyone. These were always my favorite projects to grade. As a reader, I learned about beekeeping and bellydancing and the campus quidditch team,* and as a teacher, I witnessed my students' curiosity inform in their writing. My Field Notes are a landscape of thoughts and lists and curiosities and bits of horoscopes and post-its and kitschy vinyl stickers. My Field Notes are one way I exercise curiosity and explore the world around me. Anyway, here are a few of my favorite Field Notes editions: Thank you very much for your time. If you have recommendations or curiosities, please fill out this nifty contact form. Sending y’all supportive, well-caffeinated vibes, Creighton Today’s Pen(cil): Herbin Fountain Pen with unknown blue cartridge * Yes, that terfy ÜberKaren inspired an adorably nerdy campus sports club. Current Curiosities
[Reading] Stuck Rubber Baby by Howard Cruse [Listening] "Daddy Lessons" by Beyoncé and The Chicks [Watching] Ride or Die MAGA AND THE REAL HOUSEWIVES Since Spring 2023, I've belonged to a private Real Housewives Discord, and I've enjoyed every silly take, lighthearted squabble, and the community composed of fellow lovers of all the garbage (complimentary!) Bravo produces for us. I dabble mostly in The Real Housewives franchise and Top Chef (God, I love Kristen Kish so so much as the new host!), and I avoid the "boat shows," the MAGA McBees, and the heterosexual darkness of Vanderpump Rules and it's bleak sequel The Valley. (Bravo, please bring back Backyard Envy and Garrett Magee's slutty lil mustache!) More often than not, we as a Discord community agree on the villains and the current heroes, who've yet to enter their villain eras. Some villains are easy to coalesce around. For example, the OG from the OC Vicki Gunvalson, from Bravo's first iteration of the franchise, The Real Housewives of Orange County (RHOC), is a classic Real Housewives villain. Vicki, a mother of two and insurance boss, often makes queer/transphobic comments, openly supported Trump and his three wildly racist presidential campaigns, and allegedly lied about her then boyfriend's fake cancer to garner sympathy from her suspicious cast mates. Vicki's history of problematic behavior over 14 seasons made it easy for an audience of mostly women and queer men to paint her as the Ur-villain of The Real Housewives. Eventually, Vicki became too toxic even for Bravo, so the network let her go before bringing her back for two seasons of The Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip. Then at BravoCon in 2025, Andy Cohen gave Vicki back her orange for the twentieth season of the show. Now, do I like Vicki as a fellow human? Absolutely not. She is garbage (pejorative). Do I like seeing Vicki terrorize her cast mates? Emphatically yes. Vicki brings a certain chaos that adds life to an otherwise stuffy franchise. Another über-villain is Ramona Singer from The Real Housewives of New York City (RHONY). Ramona, an original RHONY cast member, revealed her darkness over the course of thirteen seasons. Ramona, queen of crocodile tears and quick, meaningless apologies, made a name for herself by attacking Bethenny Frankel (who went from hero to menace over ten seasons) and other younger cast mates. Ramona's descent into villainy culminated in the infamous Black Shabbat dinner co-hosted by new cast member and former Fox News contributor Ebony K. Williams. At the dinner, Ramona interrupted the prayer and made many insensitive (that's putting it lightly) comments about Italians and Jewish and Black people. After that disastrous season, Ramona and the rest of the cast were put on pause while Bravo retooled the show. Also of note, during the pandemic Ramona became a semi-regular fixture at Trump's Mar-a-Lago with her ex-husband Mario. Like Vicki, Ramona was featured on two seasons of The Real Housewives Ultimate Girls Trip. Then Ramona was promptly disinvited from BravoCon 2023 for allegedly using the N-word when talking to Bravo producers. Unlike Vicki who went from working mom everywoman to the Karen of Karens, Ramona always flirted with villainy, which led to her own downfall. And the audience collectively breathed a sigh of relief when Ramona finally got the boot. When RHONY returned, the audience was introduced to bonkers (complimentary, mostly) new women like Jenna Lyons, Sai De Silva, Raquel Chevremont, and absolute queen Jessel Tank. Erin Lichy, an uptight waspy Jewish woman, was also part of the cast. The audience immediately turned on Erin, who is a Trump supporter and donor to his "stop the steal" fundraising campaign. Erin also responded with typical cishet white woman fragility to criticisms from fellow cast mate Ubah Hassan, a stunning, sharp-tongued model. Erin represented a relatively benign (when compared to Vicki or Ramona) villain who the audience loathed. Aside from her Trump association and basic cishet white womanness, Erin's only real crime was having the personality of a used teabag. Yet the audience loved to hate her. After two seasons, Bravo again needed to recast RHONY with Erin returning for Season 16. (No good summers left Princess Carole Radziwill, a friend of Ghislaine Maxwell, is also returning to the franchise after a six year hiatus.) While Erin never went full racist, queer/transphobe in the vein of Vicki and Ramona, the audience will again inevitably deem her the villain and rightly so for her political contributions and other recent wild public statements. (Or maybe it will be Carole?) A few weeks ago, Bravo's newest franchise finished its stellar freshman season. The Real Housewives of Rhode Island (RHORI), featured Italians and Lebanese cast members reminiscent of the golden early days of The Real Housewives of New Jersey. (Bravo, we don't need RHONJ back. RHORI fills that void perfectly.) From the jump, Alicia Carmody became a fan favorite with her ditzy persona and endearing love of crackers (pronounced crackahs in her thick Rhode Island accent). Alicia is a Trump voter and donor, which is problematic yes, but it's not as horrific as the filmed behavior of Vicki or Ramona and is on par with the benign malevolence of Erin. However, I think Alicia should be placed in the same villainous category as overt bigots Vicki and Ramona even though her actions are more covert and because she hasn't as of yet said anything openly racist or queer/transphobic on film. Alicia’s Trump vote, like that of Vicki and Ramona and Erin, helped to create the environment in which Trump could strip away women’s bodily autonomy, in which Trump's ICE stormtroopers could invade Minneapolis-St. Paul killing two people (see also Houston, TX, and Biddeford, ME, among too many others), in which Trump and Evangelicals could target trans people and their access to healthcare, in which Trump could start a seemingly unending war in Iran and on and on and on. Alicia’s vote for Trump is both functionally and materially violent, racist, and queer/transphobic. Alicia’s vote has real world impacts and creates real harm for marginalized people. In this way, Alicia is just like Vicki and Ramona, but so far she’s better at not getting caught on camera. Alicia is nearly universally loved by my fellow garbage (complimentary) Discord members for being a kooky dumdum. I'm the rare acceptation and find her reception puzzling and inconsistent when compared to other Trumpy franchise villains. Honestly, I do not understand why folks willing overlook the very real consequences of Alicia's Trump vote while laying that same albatross across the necks of Erin, Ramona, and Vicki, among others. Again, on the scale of mega (or MAGA?) villainy, Vicki and Ramona win that hella dark race by a Deep South country mile. But the gray areas inhabited by Alicia and Erin still represent potential villainy. After all, you need darkness to make gray. Please note, I'm not judging anyone for watching RHORI, RHONY, and RHOC. I watch and enjoy them all! But I do think we need to look deeply and critically at who these women are and how they impact the real world around us. Anyway, if you're curious, here are my current favorite cities:
Thank you very much for your time. If you have recommendations or curiosities, please fill out this nifty contact form. Sending y’all supportive, well-caffeinated vibes, Creighton Today’s Pen(cil): Sherpa WTF Sharpie Cover P.S. Bravo, please also bring back Ladies of London: The New Reign. The cast was perfection (minus Margo, obvi). Current Curiosities
[Reading] Star Wars: Darth Maul - Black, White & Red [Listening] "The Trees Saw Everything" from Vibe Check [Watching] Widow's Bay (Matthew Rhys - swoon) A CASE STUDY IN ALLYSHIP On 18 April 2025, Wisconsin Judge Hannah Dugan confronted ICE officers, there to arrest undocumented immigrant Eduardo Flores-Ruiz, by referring the immigration agents to the chief judge's chambers because their administrative warrant wasn't adequate to arrest him. Flores-Ruiz was in court to face battery charges, and ICE used his attendance at the hearing as a trap to detain and deport him. Judge Dugan's actions allowed Flores-Ruiz to slip out of the Milwaukee courthouse, ensuring his right to due process. I am not defending Flores-Ruiz's alleged crime of battery. Rather, I am acknowledging the importance of the rule of law (when ICE, CBP, and the Trump Administration behave lawlessly every day) and highlighting what real allyship through action looks like. Judge Dugan placed her body between Trump's ICE thugs and their target. Judge Dugan put her career and her reputation on the line to defend the rule of law and to protect a member of a marginalized community actively targeted by Trump's violent white supremacist policies. Judge Dugan demonstrated more than allyship through her actions. Indeed, Judge Dugan exceeded basic allyship becoming an accomplice. Basic allyship requires little personal or professional risk, which is why (cishet white women) allies* are often deeply disappointing. Being an accomplice requires risk - risk to person, risk to profession, risk to reputation - in order to disrupt the status quo and ensure liberation for marginalized communities. The ACLU of Kansas succinctly analogizes the difference between allies and accomplices: [A]llies are more like cheerleaders, rooting for [marginalized groups and their liberation] from the sidelines without significantly participating [but] accomplices are out on the field, playing the game with members of the community and taking action to further the cause of [marginalized groups and their liberation]. We don't need more cheerleaders. We have enough. We need more fellow players. We don't need more allies. We have enough. We need more accomplices. In these dark Trumpy times, it's not enough to be an ally - you need to be an accomplice. CODA For her actions, Judge Dugan resigned her position and was tried and found guilty. Though she was spared jail time, Judge Dugan was fined $5,000 for her actions as an accomplice. U.S. District Judge Lynn Adelman, showing his pre-Boomer agèd cards, said Judge Dungan was a good person who made a bad decision. But we need more good people, more accomplices like Judge Dugan who are willing to make bad decisions if we are all going to survive the next two and a half years of Trump and his goon squad. Thank you very much for your time. If you have recommendations or curiosities, please fill out this nifty contact form. Sending y’all supportive, well-caffeinated vibes, Creighton Today’s Pen(cil): Metallic Sapphire Sharpie** * I am calling out cishet white women specifically because A) they often claim to be allies without actually doing the work of allyship; B) their proximity to cishet white patriarchal power often overrides their alleged allyship; and C) cishet white men will never truly be allies because their power is always already corrupting. Cishet white women are where we can see potential movement; that is, cishet white women will become accomplices only when they renounce their blind allegiance to white patriarchal power. (I believe I'm now firmly in my Magneto era.) ** Uff da, I'm really on a Sharpie kick lately, which means I'm probably seeking stability, permanence in the chaos of our current political moment. Please note: I'm hella heated and may continue to tinker with my language here and there, but my general controlling idea will remain the same.
Aunt Maries Are Not The Way. Today, I'm skipping the regular Current Curiosities to dive directly into Matthew Vines' wildly offensive opinion essay "I'm Gay, Not Queer. It Matters." published in this morning's New York Times. Happy last day of Pride Month, I guess. Like the titular Uncle Tom, Vines as Aunt Mary seeks to align himself with moderate and conservative Christian and white cisgender heterosexual systems of power by claiming (in the same misguided vein as the Human Rights Campaign) that we are just like you. That gay people, but not queer people, are deserving of equal rights. But as we've learned, no amount of we're just like you will protect queer and trans communities from cishet bigotry and violence. We are always already other. And what Vines is actually saying is I am not like those other queers; rather I, a white cisgender gay man, am just like y'all white cisgender heterosexuals with all the power and protections that I covet - but only for myself. Imagine hating yourself so deeply that you would willingly choose to aid your oppressor as your own community is targeted and harassed, as your oppressor finds new and well-worn ways of stripping your community of its rights to life and liberty. Again and again history and literature show us that the Aunt Maries, the Uncle Toms, the bootlickers themselves meet the same end as the communities they betray. No amount of we're just like you will protect you, will protect us. Vines represents a problematic and dangerous sect of white gays. That is to say, Vines' white and cisgender identities and his proximity to white cisgender heterosexual power overrides his solidarity with broader LGBTQ+ communities - particularly queer and trans communities of color. He seeks rights for himself and those who look like and act like him at the expense of equal rights for folks locating themselves (via sexual and romantic orientations, gender identities and expressions, etc.) under the broader queer umbrella. Queer is an identity. Queer is a call to action. Queer is a movement. Queer is a political statement. Queer is otherness and that is power. Queer challenges oppressive heterosexual and white supremacist systems. (Vines should take a note.) Queer reclaims the slur that was hurled at us (and still is, though fagot seems to be more en vogue these days) on the playground, on the street, in schools and offices and churches. Queer is collective. Queer is our ability to work across our in-community differences in identity and gender and ethnicity and class. Queer confronts white cisgender heterosexual power, but not in the us/them binary Vines asserts. Rather, queer dismantles the systems upholding white cisgender heterosexual power. Queer is emancipatory. Queer is liberatory. Queer is our survival. And no amount of Vines' rejection of queerness or his we're just like you will protect him or any other queer or trans person from the bigotry and violence of white cisgender heterosexual power. Thank you very much for your time. If you have recommendations or curiosities, please fill out this nifty contact form. Sending y’all supportive, well-caffeinated vibes, Creighton Today’s Pen(cil): Silver Fox Tools Limited Edition Mini Sharpie Caddy P.S. This is why I've never been a supporter of Secretary Mayor Pete. P.P.S. This also why I do not support Fargo-Moorhead Pride - it caters too much to the cishets without protest or advocacy for our rights. P.P.P.S. Am I in my Magneto era??? Current Curiosities
[Reading] Pedagogy of the Oppressed by Paulo Freire (reread) [Listening] "Nobody Knows How To Be A Fan Anymore" from Vibe Check [Watching] The Sheep Detectives WHERE I LIKE TO GO AROUND TOWN As an engaged community member, I try to support local businesses that in turn support queer and trans communities and are owned by women, Black and Indigenous people, or LGBTQ+ folks. Below are a few of my go-to local shops and restaurants in Moorhead (and a few in Fargo).
Thank you very much for your time. If you have recommendations or curiosities, please fill out this nifty contact form. Sending y’all supportive, well-caffeinated vibes, Creighton Today’s Pen(cil): Sharpie Neon [Permanent Marker] Current Curiosities
[Reading] Heated Rivalry by Rachel Reid [Listening] Houseplant Houseparty Double LP [Watching] Spider-Noir Today is National Ballpoint Pen Day! While I mostly write with demonstrator fountain pens, Sharpies, and occasionally wood pencils, I do marvel at the ingenuity and engineering of ballpoint pens. Prior to the development of ballpoints, folks used messy fountain pens or dusty graphite pencils. (Offices must've been a mess! I mean, they still are, but in the contemporary sense of messy. Just kidding - kinda.) The first ballpoint patent was submitted on October 30, 1888, by American John J. Loud. Instead of using the capillary action of fountain pens, Loud's invention used a small ball bearing, drawing ink out of the reservoir as it rolled across the page. This first model was scratchy and unreliable and often clogged, but with curiosity and experimentation over the next fifty years from inventors around the world, the modern ballpoint pen came to prominence. Hungarian László Bíró, a newspaper editor who moved to Argentina to escape the Nazis (original recipe), made the next significant improvement to ballpoints by incorporating thicker newsprint ink instead of runny fountain pen ink. Bíró applied for a British patent on June 15, 1938. (Outside of the United States, you will still hear ballpoint called biros.) World War II spurred the next round of innovations and patents. Marcel Bich began manufacturing Bíró's ballpoint pens under the name Bic (yes, that Bic) in partnership with a Spanish firm. Then, in a shrewd move, America firm Reynolds International Pen Company altered Bíró's design, bypassing his patent. In 1945, Reynolds launched its ballpoint at legendary department store Gimbels for $12.50 (over $200 today), kicking off a short-lived moment when ballpoints were luxury items. But by the mid 1950s, the market was oversaturated and prices plummeted. Ballpoints became an everyday tool and their contemporary ubiquity underscores the importance of these little marvels, the significance of curiosity and ingenuity. So the next time you pick up a ballpoint, consider the rich history of this commonplace tool. My Favorite Ballpoint Pens
Clearly, I love the ink (blue obvi) and writing experience of Bic pens, but want the extra weight of a metal body. I'm curious, what is your favorite ballpoint pen? And what are you writing with it? Journaling? Drafting essays? Jotting down to-do lists? Doodling? Regardless how you use your ballpoint pens, happy writing and happy National Ballpoint Pen Day! Thank you very much for your time. If you have recommendations or curiosities, please fill out this nifty contact form. Sending y’all supportive, well-caffeinated vibes, Creighton Today’s Pen(cil): Caran d'Ache 849 [Ballpoint Pen] Current Curiosities
[Reading] Game Changers Rachel Reid [Listening] "Go West" by Pet Shop Boys [Watching] Heated Rivalry and Red, White & Royal Blue (rewatches) Over the last few weeks, I've free-written and reflected on what to write about for this Pride season. Nothing seemed right for our current polycrisis. Last year, I wrote about how to protect ourselves while attending Pride events and how allies can practice their allyship, so no need for a redux. Then as I was listening to Game Changers on Spotify, enjoying all the smut (complimentary!) and laugh-snorting at the narrator's interpretation of Kip's New York accent while reminiscing about my own early queer explorations, I realized I was feeling joy for the first time in what felt like weeks. I knew I wanted to write about queer joy, my recent queer joy. I've written about finding joy before, but with ever-increasing Christian and MAGA anti-trans and anti-queer bigotry and violence, I want to focus particularly on queer joy. Queer joy promotes flourishing and whimsy and delight. Queer joy exists in acts big and small, public and private. Queer joy is the counterpoint to the trauma and violence inflicted on our communities by cishet culture. Queer joy is survival and liberation and celebration. One thing brining me queer joy this season is seeing how many LGBTQ+ folks feel comfortable coming into the local hardware store where I work. When my federal research grants were canceled in 2025 by the Trump Administration (because my work focused on collaborating with women and minority-owned businesses and educational institutions), I began working at my neighborhood hardware store. As a queer person, it hasn't always been easy working at this particular hardware store. Spaces like this are designed for cishet men and are not always safe for queer and trans folks. However, in my year of working at the shop, I've noticed an increase in queer and trans customers visiting the store. Some are regulars. Some are first-timers. Some are elders. Some are college students temporarily living the valley. I love seeing more queer folks shopping, feeling comfortable asking questions and taking up space - space not intended for us. And I love every minute of collaboratively problem solving whatever challenge they bring into the hardware store. Helping to build a more inclusive hardware store community brings this queer joy. Being kind and creative and useful brings this queer joy. What brings you queer joy this Pride season? I wish y'all love and joy this Pride season! And please remember to hydrate! Thank you very much for your time. If you have recommendations or curiosities, please fill out this nifty contact form. Sending y’all supportive, well-caffeinated vibes, Creighton Today’s Pen(cil): Sharpie Mini [Permanent Marker] P.S. As always, cops do not belong at Pride. Every queer and trans person, regardless of citizenship status, race or ethnicity, deserves to feel safe celebrating Pride. As Roxane Gay wrote in her thoughtful 2021 New York Times opinion piece, police harassment of LGBTQ+ communities did not start with the Stonewall Riots and did not end afterward. And BIPOC queer and trans communities bear the brunt of contemporary police harassment. Current Curiosities
[Reading] Teaching Critical Thinking by bell hooks [Listening] The Lizzie McGuire Movie Soundtrack [Watching] Hacks Adapting Diaphragmatic (Belly) Breathing A few months ago, I interviewed with a local nonprofit. The interview did not go well. I hadn't realized that my nervous system was hijacked before I even entered the organization's chaotic workspace. While I prepared for the Monday morning interview, I pushed down my concerns about the nonprofit's close ties to a prominent MAGA politician and what that might mean for me as a queer professional. During the interview, my nervous system was further tested as the cishet man co-founder very obviously rolled his eyes with every answer I gave. And bam, hello imposter syndrome! Curiously, a significant portion of the interview was spent discussing how frequently the cishet man and woman co-founders fight in front of the team during meetings. My interviewers jokingly used the phrase mom and dad are fighting, though as we know, family language in the workplace is always a huge red flag. The cishet man co-founder stressed that this was completely normal behavior and not at all unprofessional. I left the interview shaken, but as luck would have it, I scheduled therapy for later that same day. During the session, my queer therapist* suggested diaphragmatic (belly) breathing to help me focus and regulate my nervous system. After my appointment, I stretched out on the cool wood floor in my living room and attempted to belly breathe. The thing about my anxious brain is that it is great at multitasking. So while I focused on breathing, my mind continued turning over and over my unsettling interview experience. For ten minutes I tried inhaling deeply through my nose, holding each breath, and fully exhaling through my mouth with one hand on my diaphragm (a word I only recently realized I do not know how to spell) and the other hand on the cold floor. Eventually, I gave up and chose an album from my vinyl collection. I placed Mariah Carey's #1s on the turntable and dropped the needle. When "Fantasy" come on, I started singing along like I was in elementary school again. Immediately, I felt my shoulders begin to relax. After Mariah's double LP, I switched to Beyonce's Homecoming and then The Chicks' The Essential. As I sang (and shook it) with these divas (wow, I really did just write that), I realized two things. First, vinyl records force me to slow down and listen completely. That is, spinning records keeps me from hitting next on Spotify, in a never-ending attempt to find the right song. Instead, I vibe with a whole album start to finish. Second, the mechanics of singing outmaneuvered my anxious multitasking brain. As I dueted with Beyonce and The Chicks, my mind stopped mulling the interview, and I began focusing on my breathing, my posture, and the words of each song. Was I breathing through my nose to lift my soft palate? Was my posture supporting my breathing? Or as I'm wont to do when experiencing anxiety, was I hunching over?** And for someone who often mindlessly sings along without actually knowing the words or meanings of songs, was I understanding the lyrics? The collaborative systems involved in singing forced me to focus on deeply breathing and pushed out racing thoughts about the interview, potential MAGA complicity, and my own imposter syndrome. My therapist was on to something (obviously, she's brilliant) with her suggestion to practice belly breathing, but I needed to find a version that worked for me. I needed to adapt her strategy to meet my needs. (needed-needed-needs) And that's the trick. CODA After that harrowing interview experience, you won't catch me at particular farmers markets or night bazaars, but you might catch a glimpse of me singing (and maybe dancing) to release anxiety and reset my nervous system. Thank you very much for your time. If you have recommendations or curiosities, please fill out this nifty contact form. Sending y’all supportive, well-caffeinated vibes, Creighton Today’s Pen(cil): Sherpa X Savage Industries Pen Cover [Sharpie] * We need more LGBTQ+ therapists. Cishet counselors can (and often do) cause real harm to queer and trans clients. And don't even get me started on the foolishness that is Christian counseling. ** I learned a lot about the physicality of singing from my college voice teacher, an amusing bless your heart Southern preacher's wife. |
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